Hey everyone, I’ve been helping take care of my mom for a few years now alongside my brother, and we recently had a discussion about the idea of "primary" and "secondary" caregivers. I’ve heard these terms thrown around, but I’m not sure if that’s an official distinction or just a way people talk about shared responsibilities. Can someone clarify what makes someone a primary caregiver versus a secondary one? Is this actually a thing, or just a label we use to describe who’s more involved? I'd appreciate hearing some insights or real-life experiences with this.
This comes up a lot when more than one person is involved in caregiving. In my case, I moved back home to be closer to my dad when his mobility declined. My sister visits regularly and helps where she can, but because I live nearby and handle most of the coordination with his doctors, I’ve gradually taken on what you’d call the “primary” role, even though no one ever officially said that’s what I am. It just sort of developed naturally based on availability and comfort levels.
Yes, the distinction between a primary and secondary caregiver is actually quite common in caregiving circles, especially when organizing tasks or making long-term care decisions. The primary caregiver is typically the one who takes on the main responsibilities — things like coordinating doctor’s appointments, handling medications, overseeing daily routines, and being the main point of contact for healthcare providers. They’re usually more involved on a day-to-day basis and often make critical decisions related to the person’s care plan. On the other hand, a secondary caregiver usually provides support in a more limited or flexible way — maybe they help with errands, respite care, or financial assistance, but they’re not as heavily involved in managing the overall care structure. This doesn’t make their role any less important, it’s just different in terms of time and responsibility. The distinction can help with setting expectations and balancing workloads within families or care teams. If you want a more detailed breakdown of these roles, this article explains well what primary caregiver definition https://www.newcenturypa.com/caregiver-academy/primary-vs-secondary-caregiver/ is. It might help you and your brother have a clearer conversation about who does what and why.